“Taking time to Pause” – Julianne Esteves ’22

I am very excited to be fully back on campus this year, with in-person classes, events, and CBL! It did not take very long, though, for the busyness of a typical Holy Cross semester to ramp up — my Google Calendar has been quickly filled with classes, extracurricular meetings, college events, and coffee dates with friends. As a senior, I am very aware of my fleeting time as a student at Holy Cross, which means I am trying to make the most of each week, embracing all of the opportunities in front of me and going down my “HC Bucket List.” 

While I receive a lot of excitement and energy from running between these various events and commitments, it is a challenge to also stay on top of my coursework and take care of myself. It can be rather problematic that Holy Cross students pride themselves in how “busy” they are, not recognizing the importance of slowing down, reflecting, and resting. I have always found that engaging with CBL and my role as an Intern has, despite being another activity, given me a chance to slow down. I quickly learned in my first CBL experience with the Marie Anne Center that it would not offer me or the students any benefit if I was distracted, consumed with where I had to go next or what I had to complete before midnight. CBL offered me an intentional space where I could just be with people, with sometimes no set agenda or direction. Whether I was engaging with the Marie Anne Center, Ascentria, or other Interns at bi-weekly meetings, CBL has always been such a meaningful “break” in my Holy Cross schedule. And, these times were an important reminder to truly give myself the break and rest. 

I am excited about a new Intern role that I have this year which fits nicely into the theme of “pausing.” I am serving on the Student Leadership Team for the PAUSE Project. The PAUSE Project started out of Professor Cohen’s 2019-2020 Montserrat course, and it seeks to create a one hour block in the Holy Cross weekly schedule where no events and classes would be scheduled. During this time, all members of the Holy Cross community would be encouraged to take the hour off for reflection and self-care, engaging with optional communal offerings provided. This year, I am working as an Outreach Programmer, working to make connections with other student groups in order to collaborate and receive feedback on how best we can implement the project. With this outreach, it is our hope that more students on campus will learn about our initiative and want to be more engaged with it. I believe that this initiative is so needed on our very busy campus, and I cannot wait to see where this year takes the PAUSE Project. My CBL experiences have always enforced the importance of stepping back, pausing, and reflecting, so I am very grateful to be broadening my capacity as an Intern in this role and fully embracing those important elements!